What do we (humans) do?

It's both eat and being eaten in the nature world if we consider the natural cycle of life.

But we, human, have the privilege of expanding our longevity.

Jika sebagai satwa atau tumbuhan, apakah kita bisa seprivilege manusia untuk melanggengkan hidupnya? Masih bisa berusaha dan mematok untuk hidup 80-100 tahun, bahagia, sehat, kaya.

Tanpa khawatir ada predator.  Namun ternyata yang menjadi predator adalah sistem buatan kita sendiri.

Survive tidak survivenya manusia jadi memiliki banyak faktor selain seperti di dunia spesies lain. Dimana mereka bisa punah karena ancaman predator atau lingkungan.

Jadi apa yg kita lakukan dengan privilege of longevity ini? 

Apakah kita mau mepercepat 'kiamat' dengan mendukung destruksi lebih cepat,  atau kita mau menuju hidup yg lebih menghidupkan dan menguntungkan tidak hanya spesies kita tapi banyak spesies lainnya.  

 Do we choose the regenerative way or the selfish way?

Love?

I fell in love once,  twice and maybe couple of times.

Dreamy song got me smiled remembering him,  try to fit the lyric into what (might likely)  he does just like in the songs.

I remembered and reminisce.
Oh those times, his (supposedly) presence,  attitudes and the delicate mystery mist he was surrounded with.
I smiled. Letting myself swayed by the song.

Then suddenly.
Pop.

It is his IMAGE that i fell in love with, i made him out of my tiny pieces of information that i gathered and carefully yet unknownly sew by myself.

With my desired thread,  accesory etc.

But is it really him?
Is it really HIS Presence (his Essence i believe so,  because all of Everyone's Essence came from Mighty Alhighest One so I will easily fell in love with  that. No doubt)  ha

Ah love,
Can i belive in you.
Oh heart dear stumbling heart.
Can I trust you to love again?

Or was it my mental unwellness tbhat kicked in and dominating my common sense.

Oh Heart dear Heart may you always choose the best,  the kindest,  the most handsomest,  the most lovely smelling One.

The beautiful and wise Ones and may they choose me too. Together. At the same time and dimension :)

Love?
Yeah i guess

-mostly head but heart is still in head's side though not dominant-

Hehe

Bismillah

 Letting go of the delusions.

And trying a little harder to work and be.

I continue on living.

It has been several attempts and thinking about ending my life.

The reason is i feel inadequate and just not enough, mostly after seeing other people's life on social media.

A feeling of being left.
Alone and underachieved.

I guess, it is important to not always look at others.
To really understand, what we need and what we can do.
Irregardless of what others achieve and have.