Are we home yet?

 (photo by: Elizabeth Lies via Unsplash)

Imagine your most ideal house. Close your eyes, take a deep breath

If I may assume, most of us would want to live in a cozy house with a beautiful garden (wide or small).

Where is it?

Is it next to a beach? On a mountain? Near the city? Apartment? Or in peaceful suburban area?

One thing in common is, it must be standing on a land.

I’ve always been thinking, we human, always in the need of more and more land.

In Indonesia in particular, even rice fields are more likely to be converted to be line ups of house clusters. 

More lands for housing, business, industry, entertainment, big buildings, etc.

We got more building needs that we should establish.

Have we ever thought that we are the only (I must underline and bold) species that has 100-stories-or-more buildings, wide spacious basements and etc. We inhabit possibly everywhere on earth (both land and on sea), as long we could attain the resources.

Where does it leave other species? we’ll always think of them as a disturbance and a pest, a cockroach on our bathroom, a group of ants in our sweets, mosquitoes that just won’t quit, rodents that are stealing our food, flies that exist for the indicator of whether something disgusting is on the radar, or grass on our lawn that keeps persistently growing and trees which roots are breaking our floor? We can name them, they’re so many.

Have we ever thought that we might be also disturbance to their natural habitat, their ecosystem? That we dominate their ‘house’ first?

Have we ever thought or even assess about what would happen to the existing ecosystem if we build something in some land? Honestly, I myself haven't.

We forgot about them. We forgot that we’re also an occupant in this earth.

What makes me sad and confused the most are

we arrogantly admit ownership on every single bit of land that we could find, we occupied every single space.

We change soil into ground, jungles into farms, prairie into parks, shrink nature and the whole ecosystem into lawn and garden, generalized and treat land as something lifeless and inactive called lots. 

We sell them and the whole inherited ecosystem within. It is a matter of survival for other species, whether they can survive to cohabit, move or die (or even extinct).

And we proudly say “I have a lot of lot, my house is everywhere, they have big beautiful wide landscapes and gardens” only roses, other beautiful plants and smartly disguised and discreet animals that could survive in those gardens. 

Aren’t we the richest creature? 

As I think that we should also consider to note is by disrupting the land and the ecosystem, our live might also be affected. There must be minor or major effect that will get to us. Mostly it’s the short term beneficial profit and long term non-beneficial chaos.

I was reading Nat Geo on Climate change issue 2015. They wrote about small house movement, the things that i always think about small houses are: 

1. Exciting 

2. Energy efficient and much greener 

3. More affordable 

4. It can be moved from time to time 

5. More independent. 

However they wrote something which made me realize (what I think the most profound reason, that it should be built) that it creates less distraction to spend more time outdoor. It has more open wide space that we ever thought about (if only we could shift our perspective, not inside out but outside in). It enable us to go into our real house, nature. 

Less walls, less separation, more connectivity with everyone and every beings.

If I ever remember traditional houses in Indonesia. Most culture and tribes here don’t occupy lots or wide closed space. It’s more connected to lawn, garden or even nature. One of the best house system that I’ve ever learnt is Dooryard system, which provides the endless cycle of energy. There’s a house, human, animal, and at least two kinds of plants (shrubs and trees), the ecosystem is still maintained however with human intervention. Though it’s still anthropocentric it still acknowledge the role that’s being played by other species.

Let’s go backward, let’s remember where and why we feel at home.

It can be about the person that will wait and be there with us.

But let’s dig deeper, don’t we sometimes feel at home in somewhere irrelevant with traditional/conventional house form? 

Isn’t it more when we feel that we’re connected with something or someone, 

and we feel a flow of love and positive energy toward us?

Let’s try to remember and redefine our ‘home’, slowly. 

I know that it’s a long process, I myself is still on that journey to search the feeling of being at home and a sense of connectedness with more human, beings and nature.

Let’s walk together on this road :)

Midnight Contemplation

Something that I also surprisingly found is that our raw ego have the tendency to live our life freely disregarding the people who are not related to us,
the organism that reside around us,
and the environment that we live in.

We would think that we only have one life to live in this world, and we may not still be living here to face our consequences later on.
We would not be there when the ozone is gone, or when there are no more plants to generate oxygen and produce food and energy for us.

Nevertheless without us realizing, everything is forming a very complex and entangled web of life, where if we do an action carelessly, it will create damage and chaos in other part.

Moreover, more than any harm to us, if we still live our life this way we would never stop craving for the absolute happiness, fulfillment, peace and purification.

At that time, we will try to seek God to repent our 'sins'. And I think this cycle would never end if we still confront that raw ego. There might not be a lot left for us in the end. The thirst will be more unbearable to the physical resources and undermining our own conscience.

Therefore tonight or anytime we are ready, let's surrender ourselves to the mighty One, God, the Source, Universe, or whatever we call It. Let's leave what our ego crave, because it will never take us anywhere.

We might not be the holiest or the wisest creature, but we can always try to pursue the way, as long as we tried.

Before you shout it out

Think that you did this to yourself, and there was where the pain comes from..

It's in every little things, even when you are failing by pure external factor.
It's about yourself and your attitude that could change that failure,
either you're going to stand or you're going to crumble down.

This might resulted in ignorance, anger or happiness.
It's all about what we see and reflect within ourselves.

From us human destroying our own home or the laziness that prevents achievement, we are doing this to ourselves, it's like the act of great masochism, we were born pure, unknowing good and bad. We were born to do something, our own existence brings its consequences itself.

So instead putting the blame on others or in other hand curse yourself because you feel extremely guilty. Just realize it and not getting attached to it. Our world problems is made by our own mind, so to solve them is also just swim across and not drowned in them.

Cita-cita baru

Menjelang akhir tahun 2012,

cuci gudang bukan hanya terjadi di toserba-toserba

tapi sepertinya akan terjadi juga disini

Akan saya tulis mungkin semua draft-draft post yang saya pikir terlalu konyol untuk dikeluarkan, 

who would've really read this anyway? hahaha

Jadi cita-cita baru yang terselip di otak saya, dan perlahan ingin saya wujudkan adalah:

Menjadi manusia yang bisa membawa hidupnya dalam satu tas ransel.

Saya gak tahu apakah karena hasil babak belur dari pengalaman atau tidak, 

Saya menjadi takut akan suatu bentuk kemapanan,

It's just when you get so comfortable with all of the material you've got now, 

Big chance you would really missed them when they're gone.

When the truth is, we human never possesed something, 

everything was all just borrowed,

even our own existence.

Sampai pada suatu titik saya semakin menihilkan keinginan dan memadatkan kebutuhan.

Cita-cita ini tergagas ketika saya mengantarkan salah satu teman dekat saya untuk melihat-lihat properti, katanya ia ingin mencari rumah untuk diinvestasikan atau mungkin ditinggali.

Otak saya langsung mencerna, bahwa mungkin fase ini akan datang pada saya.

Suatu saat nanti jika saya tinggal di kota yang saya tinggali ini dan saya bekerja di kota metropolitan disampingnya, dan saya sudah menikah. Saya harus mencari tempat tinggal yang strategis dengan tempat saya dan suami saya bekerja, entah itu di kota metropolitan atau di kota ini. dan jika saya ingin memenuhi kebutuhan-kebutuhan ataupun keinginan kami, kemungkinan gaji yang kami terima belum bisa mencukupinya, saya harus melakukan suatu bentuk investasi pada sistem moneter, entah itu tabungan, properti ataupun benda berharga lainnya. 

Banyak rentetan hal dan keterikatan pada sistem yang terjadi jika saya hidup dengan cara ini, 

dan saya merasa, saya belum sanggup menjalaninya. 

Saya butuh mencari alternatif

Mungkinkah alternatif itu ada? 

Saya pun masih mencarinya, 

dan sejauh ini saya baru menyimpulkan melakukan simplifikasi dan peleburan terhadap keinginan dan kebutuhan menjadi suatu hal yang dapat mengawali alternatif itu.

Ditambah cita-cita utama saya masih melekat bahwa saya tidak merasa hidup saya beresensi jika saya tidak menjadi manusia yang berguna dan bermanfaat bagi keseluruhan elemen alam raya ini.

Ketika kita terhimpit beban kita sendiri, bagaimana kita bisa menolong orang lain?

Namun pada akhirnya kalaupun memang saya harus menjalani kemungkinan di atas saya tidak akan menolak dan tidak bisa menolak lebih tepatnya.

Jadi, di akhir kata, tas ransel pada kalimat diatas merupakan suatu analogi dari suatu wadah hasil simplifikasi dan keseimbangan.

Semoga saya dapat menapakinya, dan saya harap anda juga :)

unlimited heaven

Some people says that i could've been an agnostic. hmm...well maybe i am but to look at a more analytical way..perhaps i'm not..i absolutely believe there's a God, there's a perfet conception of creation whoever the creator is..on whatever names does it stands..sometimes i called it the Universe, sometimes i called it by other name..and i do apply the basic rules or we could say golden rules on anykind of religion, maybe not really on the rituals..i do believe if i follow those golden rules (i.e. compassion, helping others, be good to yourself and others beings and universe) my life is on the right lane, and i won't make any damage to me , others, and this universe. The different is that I apply and follow those rules by basing the rules on a sufficient reason..i know that those rules made by a reason that is really logical that could be a benefit and guide to be follow and apply -not to be put on a harsh discussion but rather on a logical one- but i see the pattern that most of religious people believe to follow those rules because they afraid of God's anger and want a grant for living an afterlife on heaven eternally. I really apreciate and respect this perspective, because afterall we reach our peace on a lot's of different way. And to have even a very tiny piece of heaven we really have to work and be obidience to a massive amount of rules of the combination of rituals and golden rules (and most of qualification weight more to the rituals). And every religion have a different qualification of heaven requirement especially according to the very layer of religion entity. Somehow it makes me think that i don't want an afterlife of heaven, perhaps because ritually i don't think that i won't ever fit on the perfect measurement to execute all of the rituals. therefore until today i choose to live my life basic on golden rules and rituals that i could execute and i know have a very sufficient reason, i want to live my life to be sincere, if i want to help others i want to help them base on my willingness and empathy not because i want a proud pat on a head for being good. Well maybe i bit the forbidden fruit that cast me off from the conception of heaven on most people mind..but i do believe that God is good, and if there's a heaven on the afterlife...i believe it's opened for good people and that good qualification is maybe still unknown variable that maybe i wouldn't discover until the day i die but I am sure that the people who are given a place in heaven is not based on a very narrow qualification...and anyway why wait for heaven on the afterlife..why not creating it here, now and anywhere you go on earth..let's be good :)

PR Banget deh!

Kalimat diatas memang terkesan ambigu dan sedang naik pamor dikalangan anak muda yang berkonotasi lebih berarah kepada negative,  sedangkan yang saya bahas disini adalah “PR banget deh!” dalam konotasi positif yang lebih berarah kepada urgensitas yang harus segera dituntaskan. 

Kalimat ini tercetus ketika saya sedang menggunakan jasa kereta api jabodetabek kelas ekonomi ke jurusan Jakarta lebih tepatnya, saya sangat prihatin terhadap kondisi penumpang-penumpang yang kebanyakan berasal dari kelas marjinal, yang memang naik kereta kelas ekonomi ini karena tidak punya pilihan lain yang lebih murah. Mereka setiap hari bersusah payah berdesakan naik ke kereta ekonomi yang kadang sering tidak manusiawi kepadatannya, dengan segala ketidaknyamanannya mereka datang ke Jakarta untuk mengadu nasib, untuk sekedar melihat peluang yang mereka pikir dapat menjawab masalah-masalah yang mereka bawa dari asal daerah mereka. 

Saya sangat miris melihat kenyataan itu, dimana urbanisasi menjadi momok yang seperti dihalalkan oleh masyarakat dan juga PEMERINTAH. Saya sedih melihat begitu banyak orang yang tidak beruntung dan mereka tidak dapat melepaskan diri mereka dari kesusahan mereka tersebut, entah saya mungkin terlalu perasa atau tidak, saya merasa naik kereta ekonomi seperti melihat papan tulis yang berisikan soal soal pekerjaan sekolah atau rumah yang harus diselesaikan. Saya memang masih belum menemukan format yang paling tepat untuk menjawab masalah-masalah ini, mungkin bidang yang akan saya konsentrasikan adalah pemberdayaan masyarakat di bidang ekonomi yang saya harapkan dapat mengurangi tingkat kemiskinan masyarakat kita. Saya masih banyak harus belajar, saya masih belum tahu banyak hal. Namun saya akan berusaha menjawab PR ini, paling tidak satu soal saja dulu.